Today was pretty good...I didn't sleep well at all last night, so it was hard to drag myself out of bed this morning...but overall it was a good day. Worship time was great, & Kal reminded us that we are all chosen...chosen for salvation, but also chosen for the school this year. So many people weren't accepted for the year, or were denied visas, but God had other plans for us 17. It was a good reminder, after a nice relaxing week, of WHY we're coming back & working so hard.
Scott started his teaching on eschatology today...whew. This has been something I've been looking forward to & dreading all at the same time. We only got through dispensationalism today, & next monday we'll talk about covenant theology. I have a feeling that this will be one of few areas that I disagree with their beliefs in, but I'm keeping an open mind & even if I DO disagree with what they believe, it's a pretty minor issue to dispute, since no one REALLY knows until the end actually comes. But I'll be interested to hear all the theories laid out & how each came to be & where they stand scripturally.
Music Theory & Ear Training were HARD today. I got my ear test back, & I got a 75% overall...which actually wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. We started chapter 2, & it is scary. I'm not looking forward to it at all. Theory wasn't as bad...but by that time of day it's harder to focus because I'm tired & full from lunch. Haha. Luckily Kal the Freak teaches that class so it keeps me somewhat engaged.
Worship Teams went REALLY well today, I was pretty pleased...especially considering some of us didn't get to practice at all over the break. We played a song that Teresa wrote & it sounded really great, & it was just really good worship time.
Ugh, CBC rehearsal tonight...the performance is next weekend though, & then I'm DONE & never have to do it again. So pray that I can keep a good attitude for two more weeks. And also pray that we will get a day off school sometime next week, because we'll have CBC practice on monday, dress rehearsal on wednesday, & then performances friday, saturday, & sunday. Ugh. I'm ready for it to be over.
I can't believe Christmas break is in 3 weeks. That's insanely soon.
Break was amazing. I ate alot & got to spend some really great time with family & friends.
God definitely used me, I think, in conversations with a couple of my friends. I felt like I actually accomplished something this week, even though I wasn't in school. One thing that EVERYONE told me is how happy I look. I love it that people can see what God is doing in my life before I even tell them. It's such an encouragement to know that I HAVE changed, & God is already using me, possibly in ways I don't even know, & may never know.
Today will be spent catching up on Bible reading & relaxing before school tomorrow. Only 3 weeks till Christmas break, & I know it's going to be BUSY. But I'm ready.
Today was awesome. We met at a coffee shop instead of the building for Exploring Worship class. We talked today about our attitude in approaching worship, & how easy it is to allow pride to keep us from worshipping properly. The book described it as "reverse hedonism"...if it feels uncomfortable or we don't want people to think of us badly, we don't do it. But worship in no way feeds your own ego. It has nothing to do with you. Praise is contingent on who God is & what He's done. So don't think you're "too cool" to lift your hands or be "too afraid" of what people think to shout out to God. Both are examples of pride, & neither one pleases God.
Instead of class, we went back to the building & Teresa led us in prayer. Basically we just prayed for like 5 minutes on our own, & then went around the room telling what God had showed us while we were praying. We did it twice, & both times all of the words & pictures we had all lined up for a specific person. The first time was Stef, & the second time was for John. I had a really interesting picture for John...though I didn't realize it was for him until after. Anyway, I saw a circus elephant (random, right?!) performing all sorts of stunts & tricks for peanuts. And I thought, "Why would such a massive animal do all these ridiculous things for something as insignificant as peanuts?!" At first I had no clue what it meant, but then once God showed me it was for John, He gave me the answer: God promises to reward us for our faithfulness. So the peanuts, as insignificant as they seem from the outside, are the reward. And the elephants LOVE the peanuts, & the peanuts motivate them to do the tricks. It was definitely the weirdest picture I've ever had, but I liked it.
Songwriting was good, but it draaaaagged on after lunch. Haha. We didn't have worship teams so we got out an hour early. Josh is coming to pick me up at 4:30 & then I get to go home!! Another thing God was speaking to me during our prayer time is Change. He told me that change will already be evident in my life to those I haven't seen in a few months, & that the change in me will affect them. I don't know if this will come by example or by a word for someone or what, but if you think of me at all this week, pray that I will hear God's voice clearly if it's the latter. I'm not entirely sure how this is going to come about because God didn't tell me, & I personally don't feel like I've changed THAT much...I mean, I KNOW I have, but I don't feel that different I guess. Anyway. Pray for me if it crosses your mind.
Ugh. Monday. As far as mondays go it wasn't terrible, but I'm definitely ready for a break.
Worship this morning was a little frustrating for me to be honest. We keep getting words about trusting God fully, & JL says that if you continue to receive the same word over & over, it's because you haven't followed it through yet. And I know it's a process, but I know of a few people for certain that just aren't listening...so I spoke up about it, & pointed out what JL has told us, & just said that we need to stop talking about how great it will be when we trust God fully & actually do it already. I'm probably included in this. I don't think there's anything I'm withholding from Him anymore, but if there is I hope He will reveal it to me so I can deal with it. Like I said, I understand that it's a process, but we're just not moving right now it feels like.
Exploring Worship with Kim was good, I really like that she's teaching one day a week now. We had Q&A with JL again today, & Tom asked about learning to wait on God. I liked his answer...he talked about how waiting on God is actively pursuing Him, & having faith that He will answer you. After all, why would you wait on God if you don't believe in Him to follow through? So many people miss out on what God has for them because they put a time limit on how long they're going to wait. Waiting is patience, & without it you'll never get there. The key is being close enough to God during the time of waiting that you can cope with the actual wait. But how do you actively wait without living in the future & wasting the present? If we are waiting on something that has already been promised & already begun to take form, we can find the balance between longing for the future & being satisfied with where we are in our relationship with God right now. GOD IS IN THE WAIT! He shows us glimpses of what's to come because there is joy in anticipation. Enjoy the time you have right now because there is so much to be learned in the process of waiting on Him. So there's the condensed version of my notes...haha I usually don't post this much of what I write down but I'm pretty sure someone needed to read them. So...there you have it.
Ear Training was fun today. Kim took us to Daily Dose for the hour & we had a free day. We're still working on rhythms in Music Theory, & that's my language so I'm feeling alright about it at the mo.
Worship Teams were a bit frustrating, but I think everyone is just tired & ready for a break. I recorded part of it, but I haven't looked at it...I'm sure it sounds terrible because we did a song we haven't done in months. We'll see. Like I said...it will be great to have a break.
Josh is taking me to the airport after school, & hopefully there will be wifi there so I can write a blog. Haha. If not, maybe I'll try & write one before I crash tomorrow night. We'll see how THAT goes...
I forgot to blog yesterday. Whoops. SO, I'll blog today.
Yesterday...umm...pretty uneventful, Gloria continued where Karen left off last week in Stewardship In Life, so more about personal relationships. It was a good class. In Bible Review with Tim we went through Joshua & the beginning of Judges, where I realized that when my Dad put tabs on my Bible about 10 years ago, he got 2 pages stuck together in Judges, so I guess I'm not allowed to read the first two chapters of that book. Haha. And just as I was realizing this, Tim goes, "Cara, how about you read chapter one for us?" I was like, "I can't!" Hahaha. I borrowed Kate's Bible & it was fine, but I laughed.
There was a young adults meeting at church last night, & Scott did a teaching on the dangers of the emerging church. It was a good teaching, but I found myself kind of bored because it was actually alot of stuff I already heard before, which was surprising. It isn't news to me that the church is conforming to the world in relying on "experience" & "feelings" rather than doctrine & Scripture. It was still good to have a refresher on those things though.
I took Kate to see New Moon yesterday for her Birthday (which is actually tomorrow), & it was AMAZING! I like Twilight, & I don't care what anyone says. I'm totally Team Edward, but after this movie I ALMOST got swayed to Team Jacob. Haha. We met Bethany, her roommate Kenzie, & Kate's aunt Shelly there, & good times were had by all.
Today has been pretty chill. Relaxed at home, then went to Racine with Becky, where we were unsuccessful in finding Chick-fil-A. So I was sad, because I miss it. But then I remembered I will be home tuesday, & I can have a lunch date with my Mom there! I'm pretty excited. Anyway, we ended up eating at Qdoba instead, & then meeting Stef & Kelly at the mall. I didn't even buy anything, I'm so proud of myself. But then we went to Target, & I don't think it's possible not to spend money there. And besides, I needed shampoo. Not like anyone cares. Haha.
I get to go home in 3 days! I need to finish packing!
Today was great. Prophetic Worship all morning...we talked about the different ways we hear God's voice. It's amazing that all of the random thoughts that I took for granted is actually God speaking to me. Nothing is ever random though, I suppose. I feel like God has been speaking to me alot lately...the funny thing is, it's not even usually for me. I've been hearing from God alot about different people...people on the school, people I haven't seen in awhile, people I barely know...it's been really interesting weighing all these words & deciding which ones to actually bring forward. I never really realized how OFTEN God speaks to me, but now that I do, I hear Him more & more. It's amazing. Out of nowhere I thought of the snake I saw in my backyard when I was a kid...I remember it distinctly, it was black & red & yellow, & no one else saw it! And no one else believed I saw it either. I have no idea why it came to mind, but maybe God wants to speak to me through it...even today during class I got a word for someone. It blows my mind how much God has been speaking to me, & about some of the weirdest stuff too. One of the points Teresa made today is that God cares about the little stuff too! She told a story about her first car, & how God asked her what kind of car she would want. She thought about it & decided a cute black manual car would be nice. The next day there was a cute black manual car for sale up the street. He really cares about our petty earthly things too! He loves to provide for us, because it glorifies Him when we recognize that He is the one that provided! So good. It was a great teaching. I may expound on it later, just because it was SO great, but it's hard to cram 4 hours into one blog. No one would read it. Haha.
I had the second part of my Ear Training test today...sight singing. UGH! I hate the F scale. And the G scale. And all the scales. And Solfeg. We had to sight sing a piece of music in C, G, & F. I did C just fine. G was a little tougher, but okay. I butchered F. Oh well. Kim said I was doing great, so I think that means I passed. Now I just have to wait & see how I did on the written exam...oy.
Kimmy & I went to Daily Dose after school to chat, which is always fun. I actually had several really good conversations today. It was really uplifting, because the day started out kind of crap, but it got better. Worship Teams were great too, Kal worked with us on learning Lead Me To The Cross. For a slow song I get a few pretty awesome chances to just rock out. I think I'll enjoy playing it.
I'm so glad tomorrow is friday...I get to go home in 5 days! I can't wait to see everyone!
I didn't really feel like posting a blog, but people kept pestering me to, so I am. Now stop complaining. Haha.
My team led worship this morning. If it's possible I'd say it was even better than last time. We played Happy Day & How Great Is Our God. Happy Day nearly gives me a heart attack when I play it, but man I love it. It's FAST. If you're curious, you can hear it here:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lo8rcwe0Zm4.
School was good, Exploring Worship blew my mind as usual. It was about self-condemnation, & Kal made the point that when we sin, guilt only comes if we don't repent right away. The enemy's best strategy of attack is getting us into that place of guilt, because it only takes a moment to sin, but the guilt can hang on for years. We discussed the difference between conviction & condemnation, & how conviction leads to repentance & draws us closer to God, but condemnation leads to shame & we retreat from Him at the very time we need to run to Him the MOST. So, essentially, in allowing ourselves to have guilt, we're working for the enemy. Ever think of THAT? I didn't. I will now! Haha.
Bible Review with Gary was good, we are in 2 Corinthians now. It's been interesting to hear the historical background of Paul's letters, what was going on in the world at that time, & such. Aside from the fact that Paul is the king of run-on sentences, I'm really enjoying his writings.
Songwriting class was good, still discussing theory a bit. We didn't really have Worship Teams today, just discussed how the morning went. Everyone agreed that I'm really improving & sounding good on drums, so that made me really happy to hear. I feel like I've been improving but if others are recognizing it then I must be. :o)
One week till Thanksgiving break! And I get to go home & see everyone! Yay! It's coming at a good time. I'm exhausted.
Today was hard. I've been feeling major attack on my mind...I've just had a bad attitude. For no reason. And then I get mad that I'm mad. And then Kal taught Exploring Worship on self-condemnation, which actually helped. But I'm still feeling kind of off, so any prayer you wanted to offer would be great.
We had singing lessons with Teresa today to prepare for CBC. I do not enjoy singing. But I missed rehearsal last night to have some Jesus time & get caught up on my Bible reading, so that made it more bearable. After lunch was our first Keyboarding quiz, & I think I did alright. I'm a little rusty still but nothing to stress over.
Worship Teams were good...gotta be at the building at 7am tomorrow to rehearse & then lead. Should be fun, hopefully I get more sleep tonight that I did last night...for the past 3 mornings Kate's iPod deck has decided to set an alarm at 5am. I actually unplugged it from the wall today & it was STILL going off. Not a fan. This must stop.
Liz came on saturday, & sunday was church at Kenosha & the Skillet show. We got to Chicago pretty early & had lunch at The Cheesecake Factory, & then to the House of Blues at 4. Kate & I worked Skillet's merch table with Tate, Liz & Tom worked Hawk Nelson's table, Stef worked The Letter Black's table, & John worked Decyfer Down's table. So it was pretty busy, but we saw lots of people from church there, & what I saw of the show was awesome. We got home late & getting up for school was hard, but it was worth it.
School today wasn't actually as hard as I thought it would be. Scott took JL's 2-hour Q&A session, & Sam asked about predestination. We ended up staying on that topic the whole 2 hours, but it was sooo good. Alot of people really had a hard time with it, but I was raised to believe it so really it was great to hear it laid out systematically. He gave some great illustrations. One of the big problems people have accepting it is that if God already chose, then we're just walking around like robots & don't have a say in anything. So he gave this example: Boy meets Girl. Boy falls in love with Girl, but Girl is indifferent towards him. Boy decides to be patient & pursue her anyway, & help her get to know him. Girl starts to realize how great he really is, & then develops feelings for him. Eventually she falls in love with him & they get married. So the moral of the story, Girl CHOSE Boy in the end, but only because Boy chose her first. If he hadn't pursued her, she never would have known what she was missing. But did he control her decision? No, he changed her will. Really it's all just a matter of the fine line between will & choice. I could go on for ages on this subject...but I won't. Suffice it to say it was good though.
We had our Ear Training test today...the first part was a breeze & I'm pretty confident, but the second part was melodic dictation, & I'm pretty scared to see how that went. Oh well, what's done is done.
Worship Teams were alright...our team is leading worship again on wednesday, so that should be fun.
I'm sure I'm forgetting tons of stuff I wanted to blog about, but I'm tired so this is done.
Man, these last two days I have had some really great time with friends. Hung out with Serita for dinner last night & I am so excited to get to know her better. We seem to have alot in common. Today after school I went to Common Grounds with Rebecca & we had such amazing discussion just about who God is & what He has done. It was so awesome. She said something I really liked, & I will share it with you, "Prophetically gifted people use two words in every day conversation: 'Clearly' & 'Obviously.' As in, 'Well CLEARLY this is a problem because of...' or 'OBVIOUSLY you're struggling with this...' They think that everyone should see it because it's their gifting." Haha, I definitely say those things all the time. We had a good laugh about that, but it's so true. I'm only really realizing my potential in the prophetic in thinking about how often God really IS speaking to me. He always has, but I just assumed everyone else could see how I see. Kind of cool, actually...where I would get frustrated with people for not understanding what I saw, now I just realize that really it's the voice of God. So awesome. Such great conversation.
School was really great today, the Worship time was AMAZING! We spent probably 30 of the 45 minutes just praising God & shouting out to Him. I had a word from Psalms as well, & I just love how God has been speaking to me during Worship lately.
Karen taught Stewardship In Life & today's lesson was on personal relationships. Definitely alot to chew on! It was really cool to see that any relationship we have in this life is based under God's authority in us. His authority is born out of His love, & without His love, how can you ever say that you love someone else? God IS love, so if you don't know God, you don't know what love truly is. You will only scratch the surface & you will never unlock the full potential until you are living your life under God's authority & love. Wow. I've seen this evidenced in my own life lately just with the passion for others around me that I've experienced. I can't understand why I care so deeply for some people, but I'm realizing it has nothing to do with me, it's God's love & authority in my life! Now I'm getting redundant so I'll cut it off there, but it's definitely amazing how much deeper relationships with others are when you understand that.
Bible Review with Tim was good...we finished up Deuteronomy & moved into the beginning of Joshua. You know what's interesting? Moses' death. Did the guy actually DIE? Because he went up on the mountain & saw the Promised Land, but the Bible makes it a point to say that even though he was 120 years old he was still strong & in good health. It also said that to this day no one knows where his grave is, & that no one has ever had the kind of face-to-face relationship with God that he had. I don't think he actually "died," per se...I personally think God may have just taken him straight up into Heaven. No one really knows, but I think it would be cool.
Between classes today Kal came up to me & was like, "Let me see your cell phone." I was confused, but gave it to him & he went through all my contacts & picked out a number, entered it in his phone & was like, "Okay thanks," & left the room to make a call. No explanation whatsoever! Haha he is such a FREAK! When I asked him about it he wouldn't tell me, just said that it didn't concern me. I think if he's calling people I know it concerns me! I was wondering about it all day & then while I was at Common Grounds I got a text from my Mom that said, "I had a nice conversation with Kal today!" Hahaha, of COURSE. So I called her to ask her about it, & she just said that he just called to tell her that I was doing really well here & that he's noticed a huge change in me over the last couple of weeks in learning to trust God & let go of everything. That was so encouraging! Sometimes I feel like I haven't changed at all, & other times I feel like I've changed SO much that I don't even feel like the same person. It's crazy, but it's totally great.
Tonight is an outreach concert at Treasures, & Serita's performing. Considering I don't know anyone here who isn't already born again, I wasn't going to go...but now seeing as how Serita is my discipler I figure I should go & be supportive. I haven't gotten a chance to hear her sing except for on the KBP CD, so it will be a good time.
In the meantime, I'm ending this novel & going to do my Bible reading because I know I'll get behind this weekend if I don't!
Wow, so I'm finally starting to feel the busy-ness of the year...Thanksgiving break is going to come at an opportune time.
Prophetic Worship was good today, Teresa had us memorize Ephesians 1: 17-23. Whew. I'm good at memorizing but it's tiring. She also followed up on last week's teaching a bit saying how we will start to recognize spiritual gifting in each other, & that we will be able to see one another as Christ sees as & work as a Body. I think her analogy was "Spiritual X-Men." Haha...only Teresa...but her point was that we each have different gifts, & in order to fight the enemy we must be confident not only in our gifts but in the gifts of one another. Maybe you have the gift of healing but you need the power of discernment in a situation...don't you want to know who you can go to for it? Food for thought there. I love that class.
Ear Training test on monday...SO nervous...we had a practice today & I didn't do as well as I hoped. I don't think I'll fail, but I want to do better than I did on today's practice. Theory is getting easier now that we're discussing rhythms. Now THIS I can handle! Haha.
Worship Teams were GREAT today...we learned to play O Happy Day & it is SUCH a fun song to do. But it's FAST. I was sweaty & gross by the time the hour was up. I'm sure you wanted to know that. Too bad. I hope we play it when we lead next wednesday.
Hanging out with Serita tonight! Can't wait. I'm totally excited that she's my discipler.
CRAZY WEEKEND COMING UP! Liz gets here saturday afternoon, & then it's church at Kenosha sunday morning & straight to Chicago for the Skillet show! Tate emailed me a couple of days ago & needs help with the merch table, so Kate, Stef, Liz, Tom, John & I are going to go & work. Should be a great time, I can't wait. Liz is staying till monday to check out the school, so it will be cool to have her here! Good times will be had by all. But if I suck at blogging you'll know why. Ha.
So our team led worship for the first time this morning...I was SO nervous! We had an hour to practice before though which really helped. We played Sing To The King & To You Alone, & it really sounded great. Even my improv was pretty good. But it wasn't me, it was definitely God working. The whole time was just really anointed & I loved playing. I thought it was going to be hard to focus on worshipping while I was playing but it came so easily. Definitely worth getting up early even though I'm exhausted now.
School was pretty average after that...we had Bible Review with Trefor because Gary was at an elders meeting. He did a great job, we went through a few chapters of 1 Corinthians. Good stuff, lots of talk about worship & spiritual gifts in there. Keyboarding was in the afternoon & it went pretty well also. I'm surprised every week at how much I actually remember...I'm almost bored in there.
Homegroup was great...we discussed the teaching from sunday's joint meeting about Stephen. It made me really realize what it means to be more aware of the spiritual realm than the natural realm. When we are constantly pursuing God, it gives Him opportunities to reveal Himself to us in new ways...like the girl that saw Jesus in worship time. I find it hard sometimes to have consistent one-on-one time with God...I mean, I go to school & spend time with Him like 5 hours a day, by the time I get home I'm usually thinking about daily life things like homework, laundry, dinner, cleaning, whatever. But I really want to establish that one-on-one time, because that is so different than the time I get at school. So it was a very eye-opening discussion time. Also, Stef brought my favorite ice cream which just made life that much better. Haha.
That's what time I have to be at school tomorrow. My team is leading worship for the first time, & to say I'm worried is an understatement. We had to change one of the songs last minute today because we just weren't getting it...well, I wasn't. So I don't feel near practiced enough, but it's happening. I could use prayer.
Today was uneventful. Slept 12 hours last night which was INCREDIBLE. The only class we had today was Songwriting, & Kal had too much coffee so actual class was interrupted by his jumping around ranting about the bridge of "I Could Sing Of Your Love Forever," which talks about dancing but is, in fact, much too slow to actually dance to.
Yep! That's what I got on my Music Theory test! I'm pretty excited. I think I jumped up & down. I definitely said something like, "93%?!?! On something I wasn't even sure if I knew?!?!" Kal looked at me all wide-eyed & said, "As teacher of this class, that is definitely NOT something I want to hear." Hahaha. Oops. But YAY! I was expecting MAYBE 80%...an A is good with me!
Worship was great. I felt like God was giving me a word about peace, but I was kind of nervous to actually bring it...finally I did & then right after JL spoke up & brought a word, which was actually kind of intimidating to know that our apostle heard the word I brought. Haha. But it was good. We're always talking in class about how if we want to become more prophetic we have to just go for it when we feel we get a word. So I went for it, & I know it will help me grow.
Today we had more Q&A time with JL. It's been really cool to hear some of the questions people have, & to hear what he has to say. He's great for Scriptural questions, & usually in his tangents he answers the questions I wouldn't have even thought to ask. It's definitely been a learning experience.
Worship team practice was good...we lead with our full band for the first time on wednesday! I'm so excited & so terrified at the same time. But it will be great!
Kal & Teresa are amazing & they are giving us tomorrow morning off of school. We don't have to be at class till 11:45! So amazing!
A bunch of SOW people came over on friday to watch movies. We ended up watching Taken. If you haven't seen it, DO IT. Basically this girl goes on vacation & ends up getting taken & sold into sex slavery. Her dad is ex-secret service or something to that effect, & goes across the world to find her & try to save her. All I could think of the entire movie was that it's completely sick what these girls are put through. They spend their lives chained up like animals so that they can be used for someone else's income. And I just felt so convicted...the entire movie my mind was just SCREAMING "STOP THIS!!!!" It needs to be put to an end. It's a common practice in Europe...& it's becoming more common here in the States. Craiglist.com has an entire classified section for "erotic services," & many of the ads are selling girls that aren't even 18 years old yet. This needs to end. I want to get involved, so I'm starting with this blog post to help raise awareness. I'm not sure how many people actually even read my blog, but please take it seriously.
Joelle turned me on to an organization called Love146 that's out to put an end to child trafficking, & I encourage you to look into it & donate, if you feel led. Even just buying a t-shirt...everything helps.
Today Shanon & Larry taught on finances again in Stewardship In Life. It was good...but money stresses me out. I'm doing okay, & really I've always done okay for myself...but today I realized I have to start preparing for the next couple of years & I don't want to. Haha. Bible Review with Tim was good, as always...we're in Deuteronomy now.
Back to the djembe. Kelly & I had our drum lesson together today, & it was awesome! He taught us about hand drums, like the congas & the djembe & other percussion instruments. We spent an hour just drumming & kind of grooving together, it was so fun! My hands are all blistered now & my wrists & forearms are sore, but I don't even care. I kind of want to go buy one now. It would be great for when we lead worship acoustically. But I don't suppose that fits with the first paragraph about saving money, does it? Haha.
TGIF. This week went by pretty quickly though..oh! I forgot to post yesterday about my Theory test! I'm not sure of my score yet, but I feel like I did well & when Kal glanced over it before I left class he said it looked good...so here's hoping! I felt pretty confident about it, & thanks for your prayers!
Today we talked about spiritual gifts, like word of knowledge/wisdom (when God shows you something about someone that there is no way you could naturally know), discernment, healing, prophecy...Teresa told us some crazy cool stories. Like, in the first year on the school there was a girl that actually physically SAW Jesus during one of their worship times. She saw him praying over certain people, saw him singing with them...like, with her own eyes, as if he were a physical person like anyone else in the room. That's AMAZING. There were stories of people seeing angels, people doing/witnessing miracles...Teresa always says we are naturally supernatural. I think it's true, God does such amazing things through us...Teresa once went to a prayer meeting & there was a guy that had severe burns on his arm from an accident he had had while working with tar that week. She prayed over him & he was completely healed. She said the guy was so excited that all he could do was jump up & down & yell & praise God. She didn't even get to talk to him. At one point while she was talking about healing, she looked at me & said, "Actually, while you were giving your testimony I prayed & asked God if he wanted to do a miracle, like a restorative miracle...He answered right away & said, 'No.' No explanation, just very clearly, 'No.' " That made my day. I like my scar. I think God likes it too. :o)
The whole class was amazing. One of the girls on the school is almost completely deaf, & several of us have had words that God is going to heal her. I felt really strongly that we should pray for her yesterday, so those that wanted to receive the gift of healing or have already moved in that gift laid hands on her & prayed. I went up behind Bethany & Lydia & put one hand on each of their shoulders & began to pray. Bethany was praying out loud at the time, & almost as soon as I put my hand on her shoulder I got the most intense pain in my right ear...it literally brought me to tears, but I kept praying, & I kept my hand on Bethany's shoulder. After we finished praying, we asked her how she felt. She was kind of shaken, & sadly admitted that she couldn't hear any better. I told her about the pain I had, & she said, "Did you say your right ear? While everyone was praying for me, my ears were hurting, & they felt really hot...but my right ear was hurting worse than my left one." I don't know what exactly happened, but I completely believe that God is going to heal her this year. I don't know when, but I know it's going to happen. I don't know why my ear was hurting...but I know the Lord was moving, & I can't wait for her to get healed.
Maybe I sound like I've gone off the deep end. I don't really care. All I know is what God has showed me, & that's good enough for me.
School today was pretty chill. I always love Gary's Bible Review class. Right now we are in 1 Corinthians. Good stuff. Keyboarding is going well...it's coming back alot faster than I thought it would.
Homegroup tonight was really great. We just had worship time, & Heather gave us each a verse to read out during worship. I had a Psalm that was only 2 lines, & I started feeling like it needed to be sung. I don't have a great voice. I was not about to just sing out this Psalm. Not happening. But then every time I opened my mouth to try & just READ it, it was like I got all tongue-tied & couldn't! I could hear it as a melody in my head...& Teresa is always saying that if you can hear the notes in your head, you WILL hit them. So I closed my eyes & just sang it out as loud as I could. And then a really cool thing happened...everyone else started singing it with me! So it really wasn't as scary as I thought...& I still don't care for my voice...but it wasn't about that! It was about being obedient to God's prompting & doing something that I really didn't care to do in order to praise Him. And I know if I hadn't sang it out I would have regretted it. It NEEDED to be sung. I don't know why, but I was glad that I was able to make myself step out in faith. It was a great worship time overall, focusing on the joy of the Lord. I even had a word for Stef...it was definitely a really anointed time & even in my tiredness of the week I felt really sensitive to the Holy Spirit.
I'm exhausted now. So I think it's bed time. Goodnight.
Exploring Worship is such an amazing class. I've only said it about a hundred times. But it's true. Did you know that an "altar call" after a worship time is totally not in the Bible? Worship time is designed for GOD, not for us to respond to our problems. Not to say that there aren't appropriate times for those things to be addressed, especially in times of outreach...but I found that interesting. The moment you have people come forward, you've taken the focus off of God & put it onto yourself. There's some food for thought.
Teresa gave us a singing lesson today to help with Carols by Candlelight. It actually did help, & maybe it will keep me from getting so lightheaded when I'm singing notes that high for that long.
Songwriting class was good...but we started in on more Theory-related stuff today, so I got a bit lost. But Hanna & I went to Dairy Queen after school to get ice cream & study for thursday's test, so I'm feeling much more confident about it now. Stupid key signatures...haha.
Worship teams are going great!! I can feel SUCH an improvement, it's absolutely amazing. I'm actually starting to be pretty confident about my playing...Tom came up to me the other day & was like, "You know what I like about your drumming, Cara? You hit HARD." I love that. I want to be a hard drummer, people tend to think girls can't hit as hard because we aren't as strong, but I'm going to prove them wrong.
I found out today that Serita is going to be my discipler! Pretty excited about that, actually...& then when I got home I found out she is coming over for dinner tonight. Ironic. Haha. Actually, I think I hear her upstairs now...
For a monday, today wasn't bad! Worship time was awesome. But really it always is...I dunno why I think it won't be. Because I'm human & stupid, maybe? Who knows. Anyway, it was a really great time, & Sam brought a word about starting the week kneeling in the presence of the Lord. Pretty amazing, actually. And God gave me a song today, as well, kind of from Serita's prophecy...I think it might actually turn into a legit song, not just a few bars. So we'll see how that turns out.
Exploring Worship is always great. We looked at Abraham, Job, & David, & how their response in times of trouble was to worship the Lord. They just completely trusted Him to take care of them in really difficult times. I want that to be my response as well. It's easy to worship when we have the "warm fuzzy feelings" towards God, but how about when our faith is being tested? Definitely alot to chew on. Good stuff.
Kal had to leave class early today because he got braces. Haha. So JL came in & we got to basically have a Q&A time with him for a couple of hours. We haven't really had him in class since V&C ended, so it was really great to hear some valid questions answered. Kelly asked a really good question, when God tells you to be patient, how active can you be in that patience before becoming impatient? Faith & patience are ACTIVE, just because God tells you to be patient doesn't mean you can just sit around & do nothing. Our primary active response to patience should be PRAYER. Sometimes I kind of think God wants to test how badly we really want something. Are we going to pursue it, or just drop it after He tells us to wait? And when is it appropriate to stop praying & really just wait? John's answer was that right now, all of our primary focus should be deeper intimacy with God. Anything else is secondary in this season of life. Which is good...I have potential to be distracted in more than one area right now, but JL pointed out that patience is often the antidote to worry or distress, & I'm finding that to be dead on in my own experience. I'm still impatient about some things that I'd like to see fulfilled sooner than later, but it isn't about me, it's about God's timing. Back before school I prayed that I would learn patience, & God definitely gave me something to wait on. But He is faithful to those who wait on Him, & for once in my life, I'm actually not worried about the future. I know He's got it under control, & it's a good feeling.
Theory was hard today...we have a test on thursday. I NEED prayer for that, I'm really nervous! Ear wasn't so bad today, though we will have a test a week from today in THAT class too. Oy.
We finally got assigned worship teams. I'm pretty pleased with mine, actually, though there is definitely one factor of our team that will, again, constantly be trying my patience. But it's okay, I'll grow.
Funny story, before I end this...Tim was feeling sick today, so we all went down the hall to his office & prayed over him. As we were walking back down the hallway, I looked down for one second & as I looked up again I walked RIGHT into the corner of the coat rack. The thing hit me right in the corner of my left eye & holy crap it hurt. My eye's been pretty red all day, & it's really sore & tender, but there's no significant bruising...yet. I'll be pretty upset if I wake up with a black eye. I'm so clumsy. The end.
