Drumming. And Keyboarding.

So today we had Stewardship In Life with Kal & Bible Review with Tim in the morning. We talked through the rest of Genesis, it was pretty interesting. After lunch was Keyboarding, which I have been dreading, but thankfully we are taking it strictly from a worship leading perspective, which I'm already familiar with. So mostly chords & stuff. Kim splits the class in half, which means I get a 45 minute break in the afternoon. Love it.

After Keyboarding was worship teams, & Nick came to watch again. I was nervous at first but he sat behind the kit with Kelly & I & talked us through different ways to play the song & was really encouraging. He gave some really good tips too, which totally helped. I'm feeling a bit better about playing as a whole. (If you're wondering who Nick is, look up The Spark on iTunes or Myspace, they are a worship band from LLCC.)

Tomorrow is a free day!! I'm so excited. I get to sleep in & relax & do homework...& hopefully practice too.

Oh, funny story. So tuesday night I locked my keys in my car. Hanging in the ignition. So my dash lights were on. I called my Mom, who overnighted my key to me & I just got it today. Of course my battery is totally dead. So now I get to drive around aimlessly for about a half hour tonight after Larry gets home to jump it. Good times. Sometimes I scare myself with how unobservant I am. Haha.

Okay I'm off to do some Bible reading & relax before homegroup.

EDIT: As an amendment to my last blog, I want to clarify that the 1 Corinthians passage is clear that women should cover their heads AS A SIGN OF AUTHORITY when praying & prophesying IN FRONT of the congregation. It does not say that they should be worn at all times during the church building, & it also does not say that this is a "cultural" practice, meaning it is to be assumed that it still applies to today. Just thought I ought to clear that up.

Head Coverings.

Long day today...started with Exploring Worship, & then Teresa gave us a brief overview of our Worship Leading & Prophetic Worship classes we'll be starting next week. They sound really exciting & scary all at the same time. On one hand, we're going to be learn to hear God's voice so much more clearly--through worship as well as outside of it--but on the other hand, it's really going to push us & challenge us in ways we're not used to. Like memorizing entire chapters of the Bible at a time. And learning to sing out during worship. And going out into the streets & applying His Word in practical ways. I can't wait. After Teresa's Intro we had Songwriting with Kal. Still love that class...it's cool to pick apart songs & realize what components make up a "good" song.

After lunch we had a 3 hour conclusion for V&C on 1 Corinthians 11:2-16. I know you're not all going to actually go look it up so here it is:

²I praise you for remembering me in everything and for holding to the teachings, just as I passed them on to you.

³Now I want you to realize that the head of every man is Christ, and the head of the woman is man, and the head of Christ is God. ⁴Every man who prays or prophesies with his head covered dishonors his head. ⁵And every woman who prays or prophesies with her head uncovered dishonors her head—it is just as though her head were shaved. ⁶If a woman does not cover her head, she should have her hair cut off; and if it is a disgrace for a woman to have her hair cut or shaved off, she should cover her head. ⁷A man ought not to cover his head, since he is the image and glory of God; but the woman is the glory of man. ⁸For man did not come from woman, but woman from man; ⁹neither was man created for woman, but woman for man. ¹⁰For this reason, and because of the angels, the woman ought to have a sign of authority on her head.

¹¹In the Lord, however, woman is not independent of man, nor is man independent of woman. ¹²For as woman came from man, so also man is born of woman. But everything comes from God. ¹³Judge for yourselves: Is it proper for a woman to pray to God with her head uncovered? ¹⁴Does not the very nature of things teach you that if a man has long hair, it is a disgrace to him, ¹⁵but that if a woman has long hair, it is her glory? For long hair is given to her as a covering. ¹⁶If anyone wants to be contentious about this, we have no other practice—nor do the churches of God.

Hmm. So there are a lot of things that can be argued there, hey? JL went through each individual verse on why he feels convicted that this should be practiced today. To be honest, I don't think it's that big of a deal...meaning, I don't really understand why every church doesn't do it. It's right there in the Bible, so why not? And it's not even as if "head coverings" refers to putting a paper bag over your head or even having to wear an ugly robe or something. Just tie a cute scarf in your hair when you're leading worship, or wear a hat when you speak in front of the congregation. Big deal. Some argue that this practice is outdated, but if it's in the Bible it's there for SOME reason, & why not abide by it in the event that it's intended to be practiced now? I would love to repeat all the major points that JL made in each verse, but I'm exhausted & I'm sure that would make this blog about a 2 hour read. Main point being, if I'm going to pray out in a sunday meeting from behind my drum kit, I'll do so with a scarf tied in my hair. I don't really see why this section of Scripture is so often overlooked.

I can't wait for thursday. I have a meeting with Kal & Teresa from 11:30-noon & that's ALL for the whole day! I don't have to get up early, or drive anyone anywhere, or anything! Plus I haven't really gotten to talk to either of them one-on-one since I've been here so I'm pretty excited. And then friday is only a half day...this week is going to FLY by.

Letting Go.

Today was...hard. I woke up just not really feeling like going to school, & questioning...well, everything. Before I left the house I prayed that God would speak to me during the worship time. Chris led worship today, & immediately people began praying & singing out about trusting God, & relying fully on Him, & not worrying. And then about 20 minutes in Chris stopped worship & said, "It seems like the Lord is speaking clearly on trust issues to us today...I want you guys to get in groups of 4, & I want you to talk to each other, & if any of you is having an issue trusting God in any area of your life right now, be vulnerable & speak up so we can pray for you." I knew it was me. I knew that God was answering my prayer & speaking TO ME. So I spoke up & Kate & Lydia & others prayed over me...& I felt so at peace. I don't know why I have such a hard time letting go of my life & trusting that God will provide...I guess I'm kind of a control freak & I want things done my way. But after worship ended I knew how to let go, & even though I'm struggling with it I'm taking those first steps.

Worship ended late & Kal bought us donuts & gave us a free hour instead of doing Exploring Worship. JL did the first part of the conclusion of V&C, about the role of men & women in the church. It was interesting to trace back all the way to Adam & Eve. We'll continue in that lesson tomorrow & then I think we'll be wrapping up V&C with a Q&A session with JL. Should be good.

We started a new song in worship teams today...bit of a challenging beat, but I think I'm picking up on it okay...it's fun to play when I can do it right.

I can't believe we've just started the 4th week of school...time is flying by. I can't believe how much I've learned already...I know I will never be the same.

Racine.

Church today was AMAZING. I kind of wish I could go to Racine every week. JL gave the teaching on the Armor of God, & I don't even think I can summarize it all here but I will try. Apparently it's been taught over several weeks & this week was the conclusion with the Sword of the Spirit. He talked about how the scripture says that it is "the word of God," but that he believes that that refers to the LIVING word of God...for example, when Jesus was tempted by the devil. He quoted from Deuteronomy for each response...but how did he readily have exactly the right scriptures (aside from the fact that he's Jesus)? He was knowledgeable in the scriptures & used it at the right moment as living word. For example, like when you read the same verse ten times, but only on the tenth read does it apply to your life. That's because God speaks to you through it! I love that. We are fighting a very real war, & we need to be knowledgeable in the scriptures in order to hear God's voice & use those scriptures in the right times.

After the meeting I went to lunch with Bethany & Heidi. I love them. We had Qdoba (I had never been, it was AWESOME) & Cold Stone, & several laughs. I'm so excited to see what God is going to do in our lives. Bethany & I had a great chat in the car on the way home...she gave me some really good insight to a few things I had never thought of. I think I'm going to be really challenged in the coming weeks...I'm scared...but bring it on.

I've successfully completed all Ear Training & Theory homework all by myself. I rock.

Nothing Tastes Good.

So I think I'm officially sick. Woke up this morning at 6:30am with the worst sore throat of my life. Not even exaggerating on that one, either. I got up to get some water, which didn't help, & went back to bed. And I was thinking, "Okay God, I can't get sick right now...let me go back to sleep & when I wake up again PLEASE let this thing be gone." I woke up again at 10am with no sore throat. I've lost my voice & can't taste anything, but I feel great. Thank God!

Today is cleaning day, & as soon as Kate finishes straightening her hair it will be bathroom cleaning time. Haha. I think we are going to have people over tonight to play Rockband or watch movies or something. Should be good times.

I just realized I never updated on my homegroup...it was good. Not too much to say about it because I didn't know anyone but Stef, but everyone is nice & really welcoming. Big surprise. Haha. I think I will enjoy it.

Tomorrow is church at Racine with Bethany, since Pleasant Prairie isn't meeting. I think everyone else is going to Kenosha, but I've never been to Racine & I think it would be cool to have seen all three. So that's the plan.

Bathroom cleaning time!

Genisis.

Today was a half day, starting with worship (Bethany & I had some great prayer/praise time together...WOW, I love that girl!), & then on to Exploring Worship with Kal. I love his classes. He is crazy. We've been continuing to look at where/when/why/how to praise, & he said something really good today: "Your personality doesn't dictate the way you worship; the Bible does." It's so true! So many people think, oh well I'm not going to sing because I'm a bad singer, I'm not going to clap because that's not my style, I'm going to sit down because I don't feel like standing up, & yet these same people go crazy & cheer & shout & applaud on Super Bowl Sunday? If they can get so excited over a football team, why can't they get that excited about God? The Bible TELLS us to shout to the Lord! The Bible TELLS us to dance & sing! The Bible TELLS us to raise our hands to Him! All of these things are pleasing forms of praise to Him, & they don't even require any effort! The Old Testament priests had to go out & slaughter a spotless lamb twice a day & we can't even get the effort to lift our hands or sing out in praise on sunday mornings during worship time? Come ON! I love Kal's passion on this subject. You should have seen him hopping about complete with hand gestures to emphasize his point. Haha.

After EW, we had Bible Review with Tim. I love his classes too. He's definitely done his research. Today we started in Genesis & talked about Creation. Has anyone ever noticed Genesis 1:2? "Now the Earth was formless and empty, darkness was over the surface of the deep, and the Spirit of God was hovering over the waters." MAN, that passage gives me chills! What a mental picture...& I'm sure that even the image in my mind doesn't do it justice. "the Spirit of God was hovering over the waters"...He was just EVERYWHERE. I mean, obviously He still is...but that picture of complete stillness, darkness...& God hovering there, over it all. Tim said that he believes this is how God creates still to this day; He hovers there, waiting, & then He speaks & it comes to be. For example, God has chosen us. Even before He hovered over the surface of the deep, He knew us. So we are born, & we go through our lives with the Holy Spirit hovering over us, waiting, but we cannot see it. And then, at just the right time, God SPEAKS, & we see Him, & we understand, & we commit our lives to Him. Wow. How lucky we are that He reveals Himself to us at that time, & then every day after that! All we have to do now is seek Him! It just blows my mind.

After class & a quick lunch with Kate & Becky & Lydia at Taco Bell, I had my lesson. I feel like it went pretty well this time, & John gave me some sheet music for some good warm ups. He taught me a basic swing beat...I hate playing jazz. Haha. It's probably the hardest style of drumming because it has no pattern, rhyme, or reason. It was played & then written. It's not supposed to make sense. I don't like that, I like to know what's going on. I'm not a fan of random...well, in that way. So I have alot to work on this week, but it will be good.

Okay, Kate's not home yet & the basement tv is unoccupied so I think it's time to catch up on Psych.

Self Discipline.

I'm not good at it. V&C was on self discipline today (obviously), taught by Gary. I really enjoy when he teaches. Anyway, it made me realize that I need to practice it more & prioritize a bit better sometimes. I procrastinate alot, & I need to be disciplined & get things done.

We ended V&C about an hour early, so I got some good solid practice time drumming. I was feeling pretty good about playing the song in worship team today, & I could feel a definite improvement from yesterday, but I didn't figure I'd get to play much (if at all) today since Kelly didn't get to play at all yesterday. Just as I figured, she played the entire hour up till the last run-through, when Kal called me up to play. I got up there & I was feeling pretty confident until I looked out & saw Nick (the drummer in the Kenosha church, who's REALLY good) sitting in the second row watching. Now, the good thing about being the drummer is that generally no one notices the drummer, so unless you screw up royally, no one will notice. But drummers watch other drummers. I tried not to focus on him being there--it's bad enough having Kelly in the same room watching, as well as Kal & all the other crazy-good musicians on the school this year, & I hadn't even warmed up. So I counted off & focused on Josh's bass, but I felt myself slipping early into the song & fell out of the beat several times throughout. By the time the end of the song came, I was so frazzled that I didn't even give it a proper ending. Frustrated with myself, I went down to get my shoes from the front row & overheard Nick & Kal talking about how great Kelly was doing & how Nick spent alot of time giving her tips last night. I was feeling so down on myself that I just left straight after school.

I don't know why this has been bothering me so. I've NEVER had an issue with comparing myself with other people, but there are so many multi-talented musicians here who have had tons of experience playing...I'm afraid when we DO split off into worship teams, everyone will be like, "Oh we're stuck with Cara, it's too bad we couldn't have got Kelly instead." Maybe no one is thinking that at all, but I'm feeling pretty discouraged at the mo. I could use your prayers. I don't want to be struggling with this all year but I don't really know how to overcome it either because I've never had this problem before!

I have my lesson tomorrow. Maybe that will help. Or make it worse, depending.

On the bright side, we had our second Music Theory & Ear Training classes today, & I understand it so far alot better than I thought I would. I've learned the basics several times in my life, & I guess it's actually stuck more than I thought. I'm sure it will get more challenging as we go on, but it's encouraging to at least know that I'm not totally back at square one...maybe square two or three. Haha.

Thanks to all have been praying, & that continue to do so...on top of all this I have a majorly sore throat that showed up last night & looks like it's going to hang around. Pray that I don't get sick!